Hashtag, relationship goals! The hashtag handle is used quite often nowadays. It is largely associated with couples displaying admirable or romantic interactions via social media. It’s inspiring to experience someone or something in such a manner that it becomes a goal. But, the notion of “relationship goals” has capacity to embody more. It surpasses an assignment relative to the depth of an intimate relationship only.
Relationships are so crucial to this journey through life. Some may be long-term. Some may be short-term. Despite length or depth of the relationship, the encounter should have some meaning even if it is nominal. Relationship is simply defined as the way in which people or groups behave towards each other. To me, that is simple; yet profound.
I find value in forging, positive, sustainable relationships that share reciprocal worth. The reciprocity is key. It’s an indication of both parties’ intent for the interaction and investment. I love relationships that develop through common interests, hardship, affiliation, or just by simply saying “hi” to a stranger. Interestingly, as meaningful relationships are established and nurtured a beautifully diverse community of support is cultivated. I like to call it My Village.
There are a couple of relationship goals you should strive for that aren’t romantic but are totally worthy of a hashtag, “#relationshipgoals!”
Circle of friends. I have several friend circles comprised of moms. Dance moms. Moms with boys. Moms of middle school boys. Moms with toddler daughters with attitudes. Just kidding. Seriously, we support and love each other so much. It is refreshing to have a space to complain, develop solutions, evolve, laugh and cry. Motherhood offers its fair share of obstacles but having a formidable arsenal of mom friends to help you navigate the course makes things palatable. In these circles you realize you are not alone.
Healthcare providers. I could be confusing good bed side manner with a relationship but let me bask in the ignorance if so. I think it is extraordinary that my primary care physician takes time to really engage me about my mental health by suggesting yoga and sharing a meditation app she uses to decompress. She also advocates for solo, mommy trips. She shared her experience and strongly encouraged me to make it happen for myself.
My children’s primary care provider is awesome too! She has figured out how to crack the hard personality shell that both my kids have. She knows how to communicate with them. We’ve even identified commonalities that have fortified our relationship. Lastly, my road to motherhood has not always been easy, but my obstetrician and nurses have always offered spiritual and emotional support through my journey. They’ve cried with me, prayed with me, and helped with identifying support resources. Oddly, trauma galvanizes and bonds people.
These characteristics may seem basic, but they sure are significant to me. While I recognize kindness, empathy and competence should be expected in these roles, the attribute isn’t always the standard. However, together, they optimize the relationship, interactions and outcomes.
Colleagues. I’ve been extremely lucky to “stick to” some of my professional colleagues. We have supported each other on alternate endeavors, but most importantly there is a constant theme of encouragement. Let’s admit it, we often spend more time with our work colleagues than our families so why not focus on ensuring a substantive connection? We’ve been able to make recommendations, provide job references, and have deeply engaging conversations about our bodies of work to facilitate change in our respective areas. It is nice to have good professional dialogue and synergy.
Coffee. I know, I know, odd relationship, right? But we can’t ignore just how reliable this relationship is. Because of coffee I can stay up until the wee hours of the morning just to have quiet time. I can have a safe commute to work after enjoying my quiet time the night before. It is always there in numerous flavors. Hot or cold, but always bearing caffeine to keep me alert. For that, I am grateful. Coffee is the relationship MVP!
No matter the type of relationship, cherish it. Relationships are important and they matter a whole lot! Relationships have purpose, they inspire, and facilitate healing. What relationship goals do you strive for that aren’t romantic?
Rolandria Boyce is a wife, mother, dancer, public health advocate, and tired because of the aforementioned. 
Moms rule.
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