Optimistic young African American female laughing happily and showing heart shaped sign while standing against old wall

Selfcare Is Honoring You Outside Of Being A Mom

I have a confession to make today. Over the years of being a mother, I have to admit that I definitely lost myself in motherhood especially in the younger years which is really, really easy to do because your kids need all of you, all of the time. They need to be held, they need to be fed, they can’t communicate in any way besides crying and it can be a lot and overwhelming and very easy to forget yourself in the midst of all of that day-to-day chaos, is basically what it can be. I’m having children back to back even though my kids are for the most part three and a half years apart, it’s like you get one to the point where they’re kind of a little more independent and then I just had another one. 

So, I just was completely throwing myself into motherhood which is common but I was forgetting to consider myself and for those of you that have been following me, you’ve probably see that this year, I have really, really, tried to make a point of prioritizing myself and finding myself again and doing the things that I enjoy doing for myself. 

For today I am saying that selfcare is honoring the parts of you outside of motherhood because you are more than just mom. You are more than just mom and we have to celebrate that, we have to practice that on a daily basis and it is a huge, huge lesson that I have learned this year and as I have just begun to do these small things like reading. I’m an avid reader. I had completely stopped reading once I started having kids. Outside of articles on social media, I was not reading books. I like to hold a book in my hand and read a book and I had stopped doing that. I don’t know why. I didn’t have the time for it or at least that’s what I told myself.

And just adding those little things in, doing stuff for my skin, going to take a pottery class, becoming more invested in my work even though it’s about motherhood, but it’s my thing, has brought me so much more joy and happiness and dare I say, has made a better mom because I have less resentment, I’m happier because I’m doing more for me. And I’m not saying it has to be some huge, grand gesture. You don’t have to go build a huge business or go and take a trip by yourself. These are just finding things that are just for you. I do puzzles. I don’t let my children touch them. They’re just mine. I used to love doing puzzles and I stopped doing them so now I do puzzles. 

I’m going to go back and take a dance class, but I sat down when I was thinking about doing this video and I started thinking about, well what are the things that I am outside of motherhood? And there are things that I used to do that I no longer do like dancing, but I still consider myself a dancer and I don’t even really share that. I’m confessing all this stuff to let you guys know that this is the lesson that has been in my face this year and I have been learning that I am more than just mom. 

So here’s what I’m doing and I would love for you guys to join me if you would like. I am – for the entire month of July which is my birthday month, I’m turning 40 – so I’m going to celebrate this and I’m going to share it and I am going to do a post every day in July to share who I am outside of being a mom because I am more than just a mom. I’m more than just mom. 


There's more to you than being a mom.  Take the time to find hobbies and things you enjoy.


I’m going to encourage you to find the one thing that you can do outside of being a mom. Maybe you like to run so you go running in the morning. Maybe you like to dance so you can take a dance class once a week. Whatever it is, I want you to find that thing that makes you more than just mom. 

And I promise you, when you start to find those little things that you can add to your life whether it’s daily, weekly, monthly, it just enhances you. It makes you better across the board because at the end of the day, we can put everything into our children, but we’re raising them to leave us, to go away and the last thing I want is for my children to leave and for me to be left with nothing. I don’t think any of us want that and so, I’m saying start now. Start now investing in who you are outside of motherhood. Start now being more than just mom. That’s my challenge. That’s my biggest lesson this year and I hope that it is something that rings true with you. 



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A post shared by Elisha Wilson Beach (@mylifeisabeach)


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